Day 5: Memory (Capture Your Grief 2013)


Day five of Capture Your Grief (in memory of Freddie Leigh Bromley) and the subject title today is ‘Memory‘.

One of the most beautiful memories I have of Freddie whilst I was pregnant was the first time I clapped eyes on his feet.  I don’t know how often it happens during pregnancy but I had the privilege of seeing the outline of his right foot pressed up against my tummy at 29 weeks.  I remember questioning whether what I was seeing was really his foot or my imagination.

It was on Monday 3rd June and I had got up extra early for a work commitment and having showered I moisturised my tummy with Gaia Belly Butter, as I always did. However on this day whilst I was rubbing in the butter across my tummy and looking in the mirror, I started to notice what looked like a foot shape.  I started concentrating on this area and pressing slightly harder and Freddie responded by pressing his foot more into my hand as I stroked the area.  I remember thinking how big his feet were already and wondering how much bigger they were going to grow.

I have looked back at my entry on Facebook and in my pregnancy diary for this day and I wrote the following:

Facebook – My Monday morning and week has been made already. Just moisturised my tummy only to be left with a tiny foot imprint. Bit too emotional for first thing on a Monday morning but made getting up early very worth it 🙂 Will get a pic next time.

Diary – Had the most amazing experience this week.  I had got out of the shower and was moisturising my belly and suddenly a little footprint shape appeared on my tummy.  I couldn’t quite believe it so got Rik to look and he agreed it was your right foot pressing into my stomach.  Wish I’d had my glasses on to see better but such an amazing thing.  You must have been on your side.  You did it again the next day but not so prominent.

When Freddie was born we were amazed by how big his feet were.  He had slim ankles and then these big feet on the end of them.  I thought they were beautiful and wanted to capture them forever so I unwrapped his feet from within his blanket and took this photograph.  I love this image for several reasons but especially because I took it and we have since decided that his feet look like both mine and Rik’s.  I appreciate his feet are slightly wrinkly in this photograph and I could have easily edited the image to remove this but I didn’t want to as I love them just the way they are.

Seeing his feet pressed up against my tummy was such a beautiful and emotional moment and I am so happy that Rik got to experience this with me. I just wish I had taken a photograph, but we have the memory of it forever which will never fade as I will be reminded of it everytime I look at this image and Freddie’s footprints.

Freddie's Footprints
Freddie’s Footprints


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